It was the day before Valentine’s Day 2014, and my sister Emily was just about 42 weeks pregnant. She and papa-to-be Joe were anxiously awaiting the arrival of their first baby, and preparing for a midwife assisted homebirth. (Click here to see pics from the Blessingway ceremony we threw for Em!) They live in northern Vermont, about 2.5 hours away from me. I promised Em that I would do my best to be there to support her throughout labor and birth, just as she had done for me with all 3 of my babies. At this point she was having some irregular contractions and was already a couple centimeters dilated, but no real signs of labor progressing at that point. And so we waited.

Then we got the news: Winter Storm PAX was crippling the southeast, and working it’s way up the coast. It looked like it was going to hit soon, and would most likely keep me from getting to Emily when she needed me most. And so I packed my bags, kissed my kids and my amazingly supportive husband goodbye, and left for Emily and Joe’s house up in the mountains.

I got there at about 10 am on February 13th, and settled in for the big snow storm. Em was still having some mild contractions, but no rhythm, no pattern… just enough to frustrate a first-time mama and keep her wondering “is this it?” Joe was busy most of that day just making sure the driveway stayed clear enough for the midwives to get to the house. So Emily and I talked, we ate, we danced, we laughed, we watched the snow come down, and we just enjoyed some good quality sister time. Homeschooling 3 kids and running a business means that every minute of my time is usually accounted for, and days like this one are too few and far between. Emily is only 20 months younger than me, so I can’t even remember a time that she was not a huge part of my life. This time of reconnecting with my little sister before she was to become a mother was such a blessing, and I will always cherish that day we shared together.

The next day was Valentine’s Day. Emily’s contractions became stronger and more regular that afternoon. We started timing them, but later on in the evening, much to her dismay, they slowed down and became irregular again. She was now officially 2 weeks past her due date, and although we know in our hearts that babies do not always follow the timeline we arrange for them, this arbitrary deadline was still looming over Emily. She had her heart set on a homebirth, and if things didn’t get going soon, she would have to start weighing her options. But, staying positive, we all tried to get some rest, knowing that we may have a long night ahead.

I slept lightly that night, sure that at some point Emily would be waking me up to let me know that she was in labor. But the sun came up, sparkling on the newly fallen snow… but still no regular contractions. The midwives stopped by around 8 am just to check on Emily, and talk to her and Joe about their options at this point. They decided that we would all take a ride to the hospital for a fetal non-stress test. We loaded up into the car, still staying positive, but knowing that heading to a hospital 15 days overdue might mean having to make adjustments to the birth plan.

Both of Emily’s midwives and their apprentice met us there, and all 6 of us made our way to the maternity ward. Fortunately, this particular hospital was very supportive of midwives and homebirth, and they made Emily feel comfortable… well, as comfortable as a woman who is 15 days past her due date could possibly feel!

Emily and Joe were given the option of staying there and getting proactive about kick starting this labor. But after being reassured that the baby was doing just fine in there, they decided to head home… and pick up some castor oil on the way.

The ride home was long and bumpy on these back roads through rural Vermont, and poor Emily was very uncomfortable the whole way. But around noon we arrived back home, and she felt more calm and reassured than she had in a while. The midwive’s apprentice, Jen (now an awesome midwife in her own rite!) settled in with us, and we made some lunch. But before Em could even finish her soup, and minutes before taking her dose of castor oil, she started experiencing some very strong surges. I guess that the combination of those bumpy roads, and knowing now that her baby was not under any stress, helped her relax into labor naturally.

There had been many contractions over these past couple days we spent  together that were intense enough to make Emily think “this must be it!” But I remember the first one that really stopped her in her tracks, took all of her attention, and brought tears to both our eyes. We both felt it… this was it. I was really going to witness my baby sister becoming a mother today. Holding her in that moment brought back 30+ years worth of memories of being her big sister, of holding her as a baby, always wanting to protect her, trying to support her, and feeling so much love for her. This is the woman who knows me better than I even know myself sometimes, knows me at my best and at my worst, and yet still loves me unconditionally. Her unwavering belief in me had helped me through 3 births, and now I was being given the opportunity to show her that I believed in her strength, her power, and her ability to bring forth new life like the Goddess that she is.

Over the next couple hours, Emily managed to find a rhythm and routine that helped her cope with the ever-intensifying surges, and Joe and I worked together to help keep her relaxed and comfortable. It was during this time that I formed a close bond with my new brother. Just seeing the depth of love that Joe has for my baby sis, and getting to see both his strength and his vulnerability on this most sacred day, made me feel so grateful that my niece was going to have a father like him.

The midwife, Bonne, arrived around 3:30 pm, and we started filling up the tub. The labor timeline after this point pretty much consists of “into the tub… back to the bed… back into the tub… back to the bed…” and on and on it went for about 2 and a half more hours. None of us knew if this baby was going to be born in the water, or in the bed, but we were prepared for whatever this baby decided felt right for her big earthside debut.

Once more, Emily climbed out of the tub and into bed, and fell into a period of transition. Her conscious mind was taken over by a state of primal maternal awareness, her actions becoming instinctual reflexes of an ancient wisdom from deep within. I felt our ancestors all around us, helping Emily to summon the strength of generations of birthing women before her.

At 8:07 pm on February 15th 2014, in a little house set deeply in the big woods, way up in the snowy mountains of Vermont, a little girl was born. A mother was born. A Father was born. And an Auntie was born. And a circle of love was formed around this amazing new life, this tiny spirit, this shining light that would come to be known on Earth as Lilah Rose.

That was one year ago today. Happy 1st birthday to my beloved niece Lilah, you made me an Auntie and it has truly changed my life forever. And thank you to my sister Emily and brother Joe, for inviting me into the most sacred of spaces, and allowing me to bear witness to the birth of your beautiful family.